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At this point I started LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY.

TWICE.  Fgisfdugbndbasjbhifsgnkf  OH  MYG GDSJFDG  AUSGAHUAGHUAUGDUSFUGfajdnsgfhbgjg dsnmffdgb

Hate.

HATE.  Everything right now.

IT'S FUNNY HAHAHA  How strangely contained I am and yet.

I have all this energy.  Like.  I really just want to smash someone's face in right now.  Like.  So bad.

WHY DO I EVEN ASDLMGDFMKJghbeagsyfvbhs  gnbs dfg  IT WAS LIKE.  Not even.  

Oh my god.

I think it's just cause...  I spent all that time.

And effort.

For nothing.

Like.

IF IT WAS JUST FOR ME, I WOULDN'T CARE REALLY.  I THINK THAT'S WHY I FEEL SO RETARDED.

LIKE.  I AM SO CALM.  YET SO MUCH RAGE.  ALL THE FUCKING RAGE FGSDKFIHGDS  Oh my fuck.  Just.

It's like something I was waiting for.  AND IF I JUST.

WASN'T SO FUCKING STUPID Dfhmlkinukrngfldsjifhun gs

I would've stil had it.  AUHGHASDUHGhnfjd

The ONE TIME I am drawing something IMPORTANT THAT IS NOT FOR MYSELF.  GOD.  DAMNIT.

And it's not like I can just do it over.  It's something I SERIOUSLY CANNOT DRAW like holy fuck.  8|  HAD LIKE 6 REFERENCES.  WENT OVER THINGS LIKE A THOUSAND TIMES.  AND IF IT WAS JUST FOR ME I could finish it in Sai or some shit.

I SAVED ALL THE WIPS.  ALL OF THEM UP TO THE POINT OF ME BEING AN ASSTARD.  GOD.d f gdasjignkfdshm,dgf hbfdgh kojtre0waiqjndlkm ,

I just.  I want to kill all the things.  Because NOTHING WILL HAPPEN UNTIL I DO SOMETHING.  <_>  AND AUSAGHAUDGFbb auhd bjugir8wu  CAN'T JUST BE LIKE LOL LOOK AT THIS LINK FOR THE ENTRY CAUSE IT'S HERE AND NOT ON TE I don't think that'd fly just.

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Oh my god.

Writing isn't helping.

I need to like

tire myself out

scribbling till I stab my computer to death, or something.  AUDHGDSUGHJSJfhmknmcfxl 

Comments

[Shadi]

There's nothing wrong with posting a link to the actual entry if you want people to see it, and you want to rp there, or whatever. It sucks that that happened though. >: People will understand. I saw the post you made on tumblr for it, but the comment box is never long enough for me to tldr about it.

Even if you didn't do it for yourself entirely, it was somewhat for you too, so it's not a complete waste of time. You saved all your WIPs, and you got some practice out of it. You can try to pick it back up again, and give bgs another try, or just link to what you have and go from there.

There's nothing wrong with doing that. xD It happens to people all the time. Good luck with what you decide to do!

[Dasair]

Meh. Since I posted this, I actually started over again. At first I was gonna do a different scene, but then I decided on the same thing, cause what I was doing looked even worse. PFFT. So. Yeah.

I asked one of the mods if I could just post a WIP, link to my old entry, and finish the thing eventually, just to keep stuff moving, but it turns out I can't, and it needs to be a finished thing first. lol

Sooo. I really don't care if people see the old one or not. And I don't really care to finish it, since I'm practically doing it over again anyway, just... worse. pfft.

I dunno. I don't actually feel like I learned anything from doing it, just... kinda not enjoying it at all, and feeling like I don't even understand what I'm drawing. Like trying to picture all the planes and stuff.. I just can't even do it, so I can't really... even figure out how to draw things right, if that makes sense.

BUT ANYWAY. Thanks for the comment. lol. I just kinda got over it, but EVEN IF IT SOUNDS PESSIMISTIC I still kinda feel like it was a total waste of time. orz